Get Off My Train, Shitbird: The Action-Packed Awesomeness of Resident Evil 3 Remake

All you need to know about the recently released remake of 1999's Resident Evil 3: Nemesis can be found in a five word exchange that occurs about a third of the way through the main campaign. Just as the game's protagonist and proven action hero, Jill Valentine, has seemingly escaped the clutches of Raccoon City's apocalyptic zombie outbreak aboard a subway train headed for safety, the back of the train is abruptly pulled off in a glorious display of strength and bad-ass flames by the Umbrella Corp's bioweapon du jour, the titular Nemesis. With all hope seemingly lost, a grizzled old mercenary, whose name escapes me because it was never important, defiantly utters the sure to be iconic line "Get off my train, shitbird" before heroically sacrificing himself and buying Jill some time via suicide bombing. Truly the bard himself could have never concocted a more beautiful turn of phrase, and peak Schwarzenegger couldn't have hoped for a more fitting sendoff.

From Fred Savage With Love: Attempting The Wizard Challenge

For most, the seminal cinematic moments of their childhood can still be easily visualized, and those same emotions from decades ago can be just as readily mined while reflecting upon anything from the tragedy of Bambi's mother to the majesty of E.T. and Elliott seemingly flying their bikes past the moon or the first time they saw the words "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away" accompanied by that bounding John Williams score. One of the most vivid and cherished silver screen memories of my early (or some might say "Wonder") years involves a whole lot of Fred Savage and some heavy product placement from one of my favorite brands of all-time, Nintendo. I speak of course of the surprise Super Mario Bros. 3 launch that sets up the climax of one of 1989's proudest accomplishments - The Wizard. Despite being shocked by the Beyoncé-esque drop of one of the greatest games of all time, our hero doesn't falter and secures legendary "Video Head" status with a staggering 81,520 points to smoke the competition. Now, over two decades later, I have made it my life's goal (read: one random Saturday night's goal) to see if all these years of gaming have finally molded me into a supreme gamer who is worthy of being crowned "The Wizard".

He’s a Pinball Wizard. There Has to Be A Twist: Tips for Playing Roundguard

Over the past couple of years, one of the most unexpected yet welcome additions to video games has been a rise in game developers utilizing pinball mechanics in non-traditional ways for exciting new takes on well established genres. Starting with the sublime marriage of pinball and Metroidvanias in 2018's Yoku's Island Express and further expanded in last year's dungeon crawler, Creature in the Well, the love poems to pinball may have reached their peak with the brilliant and addictive Peggle meets Slay the Spire magic of Roundguard.